Training and racing are physically and mentally taxing. This is especially true when performed during a progressive training schedule leading to a goal event. Inner dialogue is something we all deal with and hopefully find a way to channel the negative thoughts into positive results. It’s not easy and it’s not usually pretty. I beat my brain up many times from convincing myself to keep going and sometimes just to get started in the first place. Many times it’s repetitious mind games that cycle through our heads which turn into mantras. Sometimes it takes awhile and sometimes it doesn’t always lead to success. The key is to always come back even if you take a break. Never completely give up; you will never forgive yourself.
Here are three recent examples of problems that I have dealt with and their outcomes.
Setting – 9am Wednesday morning: I look out the living room window and see the neighbor’s flag waving at a 45 degree angle east to west; temperature gage says 51.3. What's that...like 30 degree windchill factor? It’s time to take the dogs for their daily walk and ball throwing of 20 minutes before I go out on my daily run. It’s also my warm-up walk. I’m bundled up with a jacket, scarf, long pants, stocking cap and gloves. I head out the door with two leashes and two dogs.
Inner Dialogue – Brrrrrrrr…f**k…do the treadmill today…only ran 5.5 miles yesterday…got to do 8x400...not on the treadmill. Did 6x400 last week…need to make progress...10x400 next week...can't skip this week. I could go tomorrow…the wind’s only 5-10 mph and the sun’s breaking through a bit. What if it’s windier tomorrow, then I’m screwed…got to go today. I can run them downhill with a crosswind…could also run east to west, wind at my back…recover into the wind. I don’t need this shit…speed kills. The trees are moving, this sucks…got to go today…f**k!
(Repeat three times and then put on shorts and T-shirt, Garmin GPS watch, sunglasses, hat on backwards and head out the door.)
Result – Ran 3.5 mile warm-up, half of it into the wind and was chilly. Started the 400s at the top of a mile-long gradual downhill and turned around and ran up the grade on the recoveries. I need as much help on leg turnover as I can get. The extra momentum provided by the downgrade lifted my spirits so I pushed harder. I finished with a half-mile cool-down and walked into the house sweating and feeling good.
Setting – Leadville 100, mile 43 going up Hope Pass outbound: I left Twin Lakes, mile 39 aid station over half an hour ago. I’m almost halfway up the ascent to Hope Pass. I’ve never done this race before. I paced a buddy last year on the last 24 miles in the dark. It appears to be the easiest of the 100-mile Hardrock qualifiers. The course has a lot of runnable surface except for Hope Pass, twice. I need a qualifier to enter the Hardrock lottery. Training went well leading up to the race. We flew in two days before the race; not too much recent acclimatization to the elevation. I’ve been on what I think is a conservative plan this far into the race and still flirting with the sub 25-hour buckle.
Inner Dialogue – This sucks…(stop on switchback, bend over, grab knees, gasp, look down below and see a train of runners in various states of fatigue)…I’m never doing a 100-miler again…at least not a mountain 100…(continue plodding). What’s that sound? Funny…someone’s puking…poor bastard…my quads are blown…not even halfway. Is that thunder? Shit…the weather over Hope usually sucks…no rain though…no lightning…where’s the lightning? Man, just one close lightning strike…not enough to kill me…just end my race, concussion maybe…not my fault, can’t blame me…I tried. (Stop, bend over, gasp, gasp). Is that Hopeless aid station? That’s not topout!…f’ing liars. Wow! It’s sunny, no rain, no lightning, damn, I have to keep going…no excuses. It’s all good.
Result – I finished the race almost 4 hours slower than my goal. Coming up Hope Pass from the other side was worse than the outbound side. I got back to Twin Lakes, mile 61 aid station coming back at sunset over an hour slower than my pre-race plan. My quads were shot but I did a lot of walking in training and put myself in gear and walked the remaining 39 miles. Got my Hardrock qualifier.
Setting – Ran this morning for the fourth day in a row; heading to the gym in the late afternoon for weights and core-work: I’m working night-shift temporarily and have been on a new workout regimen. I run every morning before lunch Monday through Friday and take physical training time later at work to do a second workout. I alternate days with upper-body and leg weights. I do abdominal sets, core-work, and push-ups. I finish the workouts with 30-40 minutes on the stationary bike. Today is day 4, Thursday; I’m sitting at my desk thinking about the dinner I brought for later. It’s time to go to the gym.
Inner Dialogue – I’m hungry…you just ate 3 frickin’ snacks…save it for later. I don’t need this crap. One day off…who’s gonna know, gonna care…no one cares, why should you? Give it up for one day. I’m tired…you were tired yesterday…you’re always tired. One piece at a time…abs, weights, bike, done…I’m hungry. Just skip today…that will lead to two days then it’s the weekend then it’s a whole week then a month then three months then six months. You’ll be soft as hell…you’ll have to start over…it’ll take six months to get back…you’ll kill yourself doing it…you know it. Just do it.
Result – I left my desk and changed into gym clothes. I was tired. I walked to the gym and started my abdominal routine, went through the upper-body weight routine, and then finished up with 30 minutes on the stationary bike while reading a book. I’m not tired anymore. I’m not even hungry but I know my body needs some carbs and protein so I feed it. I will finish the work week on Friday with a morning trail run and a yoga session in the afternoon; that always makes me feel better. The hard work will be done except for an 18-mile long run on Saturday.
Go ahead, talk to yourself, work it out, rattle the noggin' and get in gear.
No comments:
Post a Comment