Trails of Glory


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Tuesday, February 4, 2014

Why Do You Wear Your Hat on Backwards?


 
Occasionally I get asked why I wear my hat on backwards. It makes me wonder why anyone would bother to ask. My usual response is, “I like it that way…shit…I don’t know” Today on my daily run around the military post I waved at a couple of soldiers sitting under a ramada smoking cigarettes. They waved back. They see me run by every day. Being an officer in the U.S. Army it might come across to them as out of uniform to be strutting around in non-Army running shorts with my hat on backwards looking unprofessional. So it occurred to me that maybe I should come up with a good response for the next time someone inquires:

 

“Why do you wear your hat on backwards?”

 

“Because I can;

Because I’m a punk;

Because I’m an asshole;

Because I’ve earned the right;

Because I’m fast and I don’t want the wind blowing it off;

Because I’ve been wearing it this way since high school.”
 

 
 

“Aren’t you in your mid-40’s? Are you trying to make some kind of statement?”

 

“No, not a statement, a representation.

It represents my disrespect for authority;

It represents my disdain for society's opinion;

It represents the fire in my soul;

It represents the dust trail left in my wake;

It represents the sun at first light of day;

It represents my fatigue and determination;

It represents my eternal spiritual youth.”
 

 

“What do you mean by your eternal youth? Are you trying to deny your age?”

 

"Not at all..."
 
“Wearing it reminds me of stealing apples from a farmer's tree on cross country training runs;

It reminds me of jumping into the river from the top of the train bridge;

It reminds me of running through cornfields hiding from the cops after curfew;

It reminds me of rebelling against my parents;

It reminds me of unbridled enthusiasm and untiring summer days off from school;

It reminds me of staying out all night and then doing it again the next night;

It reminds me that I don’t have to grow up if I don’t want to.”

 

“So why do you really wear your hat on backwards?’
 

“Because I can.”

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